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10 Signs That You're Dating A REAL Man

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Ladies, ever wonder if you're dating a REAL MAN? Take this simple text to find out!!!


  1. A real man doesn't live with his parents or a couple annoying roommates who are constantly interrupting your love sessions -- a real man has his OWN little warm, private place where you can hole up together during the cold, lonely winter.
  2. Tired of this conversation? "What do you want to do?" "Ionknow, what do YOU want to do?" A real man won't waffle around and shrug -- when he sets his eyes on something he wants, he's just gonna go get it, no discussion, no second-guessing. A real man acts on i`nstinct and knows how to take charge.
  3. There's nothing worse than a needy, clingy man-child to quickly snuff the romance out of a once-promising relationship. A real man knows that you need your space and he needs his, so he'll abruptly sprint away from you if you get too close to him.
  4. You're pushing 30. Do you really still have the time and patience to be with a man who doesn't have a long-term plan? If your man doesn't know how to stash enough food for the long, cold northeastern winter purely out of instinct, then he's not gonna be there come next Spring.
  5. Pets have a sixth sense when it comes to men, and if you've got a real man on your hands, any dogs in the vicinity will take an instant, almost violent interest in him, often pulling towards him and barking at him out of pure hunting instinct. 
  6. A real man has his own interests and stays self-motivated; when he's not stashing away nuts for the winter, sometimes he's out living it up by skiing on tiny waterskiis behind a tiny motorboat in a wading pool.The last thing any grown woman needs in a relationship is someone who whines and complains constantly until he gets what he wants; a real man, on the other hand, won't ever complain, or speak out loud for any reason. He'll just silently go about his manly, woodland business.

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9. A real man isn't intimidated by your ambitions, he SUPPORTS your ambitions, provided your ambitions consist of gathering an ample stockpile of acorns and nuts to store inside a tree for the duration of winter. 
 

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You gotta RESPECT yourself! If he's running around lying, cheating, or literally running on all fours towards foxes and owls and other known predators of small-to-medium sized rodents, then you know he's not a real man, and you better do yourself a favor and cut him loose N-O-W.


Jet-black man-eyes. Little furry man-ears. Cute puffy man-cheeks. Big bushy man-tail. Doing his manly man-scampering up his man-tree. OOOOOOH GUUUUUURRRLLL - you better believe you got yourself a real man! 

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